ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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