She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
