Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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