every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
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