She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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