on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
