Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
