ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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