I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
