I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
