as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize