pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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