Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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