Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize