I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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