Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
