And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
