I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
