once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
