Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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