what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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