Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize