the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Randomize
