so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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