Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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