You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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