from now on my penis is your penis
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i drank out of a bidet.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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