Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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