I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
