I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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