I can text with my tongue
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
