sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
