My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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