We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
