sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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