i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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