It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
