He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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