dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
