i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
My ATM looks so different sober.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
