I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
