turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
