The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
