if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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