I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
