so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Randomize
