Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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