I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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