Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize