Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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